Planning your marriage proposal doesn't come with a rulebook, but there are a handful of mistakes that can undercut even the most well-intentioned effort. Just to give you a head start here are seven of the major pitfalls to avoid when you're deciding where and when to pop the question.
1. Proposing too soon
You've only been together a few weeks but you're convinced she's the love of your life and you're ready to propose. You might think you're being wildly romantic and spontaneous but she might see it as insincere and irresponsible. Wait until that first passion has matured into a lasting love before you even think about proposing.
2. Telling too many people
So you might want to ask her father for his blessing, or enlist her friend's help with ring shopping, but try not to tell too many people that you are planning to propose. The more people you tell the more chance there is of her finding out and ruining the surprise. Most girls would also like to think they were among the first to know and would be upset if your whole office got the news before they did.
3. Not having a ring
There are many reasons that you might choose to propose without a ring, such as feeling that it will put too much pressure on her to say yes and the fact that you're not sure you would choose something she likes. However, many girls feel a little let down if there's no ring when you propose and others may wonder if you are really committed to the proposal. There are many ways you can compromise, perhaps by buying an inexpensive temporary ring, by borrowing a proposal ring from the jewelers you intend to buy the real ring from, or by buying a different piece of diamond jewelry and explaining you'd like to choose the ring together.
4. Thinking only of yourself
Your choice of proposal location should show your girlfriend that you've thought about what she'd really like, not just what suits you. That means not proposing at a ball game unless she's a major fan, not proposing over a steak dinner when she's a vegetarian, and not proposing in a Las Vegas casino if her idea of heaven is a serene mountain top.
5. Proposing in front of family
Occasionally, if a girl is very close to her family, you might consider proposing in front of them but there are very few circumstances where you should ever consider proposing in front of yours. Strangely enough most girls wouldn't mind the odd stranger being around for your proposal, such as the waiter in a restaurant, or the tour guide that's taking you on a romantic boat ride. However, proposing in front of family members can be embarrassing at best and at worst it can increase the pressure to say yes even if she's not sure.
6. Not letting her prepare
So you might love her however she looks, but most girls want to be looking and feeling their best when they are proposed to. Proposing on a night out, or just before, is great as she'll already have done her hair and makeup, and got dressed up, but if you're planning a daytime proposal factor in time for a quick shower before the celebrations begin and make sure she has her favorite outfit with her. If you're proposing somewhere she won't expect, a white lie about going somewhere nice is better than springing it on her in yesterday's clothes.
7. An unoriginal proposal
Many men make their proposals over complicated in a bid to be romantic but the key is to do something that suits the two of you, whatever that may be. Don't be tempted to recreate a cheesy proposal you've seen in a movie such as placing the ring in her dessert, or to copy your best mate's proposal just because it worked for him. Most importantly, if you've ever proposed to an ex-girlfriend, make sure this proposal is completely different to that one. The proposals that land best are usually the simplest — the right place, the right words, and leaving the flash mob to someone else.
Still deciding where to propose? The location matters more than most advice articles admit. We've got specific spots, timing, and what to book in advance for Rome, Paris, London, and a dozen other cities.
